Greg and Kath – An American Love Story
Mood; Flacid.
I am by definition a deconstructionalist. I break down, I don’t build up. The thought did cross my mind that all this negativity might be a bit wearing and that it might be a good idea to try to say something nice about someone for a change. But who? Who is there on UFO UpDates to say something nice about?
So off I go to the web site, UFO Updates, 100 latest messages, and my eyes scan down the list. You’ve got to be joking, right? I mean, I am stuck, totally stuck. Surely there has to be someone I can enthuse about.
I notice Nick Pope’s name. A Brit. I’m tempted to say “Another fucking Brit”. There’s a few on the List, scurrying around like rats with the plague, spreading pixie dust here and there. There’s the two Pelicanists plus attendant camp followers, “camp” being the word. Shough, who is Scottish and who has now become so boring as to potentially rival Frizz Chops. Miller - well OK’ish, Dickenson – a bit higglty pigglty, occasionalist David Haith, McGonagle, kerchung. Well, you can’t mention McGonagle without mentioning Pope, can you? McGonagle trails Pope round the List like a dog trailing a bitch on heat, his nose permanently stuck up Pope’s ass. So, Pope is a man under pressure. Why? McGonagle, Clark, Roberts, Anthony hate him. Do we care? Not really. Can we say anything nice about Pope? We’ll try.
Here goes. Nick Pope uses UFO UpDates to constantly remind us he is or was important by sending in posts that say, “I made this documentary in ……..” or “I will be appearing on this……………” or “When I was at the Sec Air 2 desk I…………..” and so fucking on and on.
Arthur.
Yes?
You were going to say something nice about Nick Pope, weren’t you?
I was.
Why haven’t you?
Because he’s an opportunist who rarely contributes, he just takes.
Is that what you think?
Yes.
Arthur.
Yes?
Would you like to revert back to type?
Yes.
This wasn’t very successful, was it?
No.
Why do you think that is?
Because the entire List are a bunch of wankers.
I see. OK, go and be nasty again.
-------------------------------------------------------
You should trust me. My instincts are pretty much always right. I have had occasion to make the odd marginally critical comment about Greg Boone and Kathy Kasten. He would fail a brain monitor test and she comes across like some demented harridan determined to punch above her weight which isn’t very significant in the first place.
Ufologically speaking, from an intellectual perspective they are ideally suited. Both talk sheer crap and have nothing to offer other than hysterical amusement and entertainment for the rest of us.
And so it comes to pass.
This from Thursday, in response to the Neurologically Challenged One’s previous effort along the lines of “Gee Wizz, let’s do the show right here”.
From: Kathy Kasten <catraja@msn.com>
To: ufoupdates@virtuallystrange.net
Date: Thu, 02 Nov 2006 17:32:02 +0000Subject:
Re: Ufology Mentalities
>From: Greg Boone <Evolbaby@aol.com
>To: ufoupdates@virtuallystrange.net
>Date: Wed, 1 Nov 2006 09:16:47 EST
>Subject: Ufology Mentalities
>We've all got our gripes and pet peeves when it comes to the types of
>mentalities that arise from ufological research.
>Some of these mindsets come from the public, some from the press,
>scientists, military, and of course other ufologists.
>The ones that set my teeth on edge are:
Thank gawd, there is another sane thinker out there. I thought I was all alone in the Universe.
KK
You are Kathy, you are. Thank gawd there aren’t any more like you.
But see, they’ve found each other. Do you detect a swoon on the part of Ms. Kasten towards Brain Dead? “Why Greg, you are so clever. You’re so knowledgeable, so worldly. Teach me Greg, Teach me. Greggie, how do I undo this bottle of peroxide Greggie? Oh, you’re so strong too”.
Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalph
Well, I had to. Sick stick Biddy please, sick stick; Now what the fuck is that? Oh gee, I have got problems. And this bit is so elasticky, so stretchy. Twaaaaaaaaang. I’m not sure that should be in there.
Never mind.
I predict phone fucking to follow soon and an engagement to be announced by Christmas. You mark my words.
-----------------------------------------
Alas and alack, Alfred is brown nosing too.
http://www.virtuallystrange.net/ufo/updates/2006/nov/m05-001.shtml
This time I might use a bucket as doing it on the floor is so messy.
I feel it in my fingers
I feel it in my toes
I’ve dropped a load of vomit
And now I need a blow.
Alfred are you busy?
Are you free to go?
Cos if you’re doing nothing
I think I’ll have that blow.
I am by definition a deconstructionalist. I break down, I don’t build up. The thought did cross my mind that all this negativity might be a bit wearing and that it might be a good idea to try to say something nice about someone for a change. But who? Who is there on UFO UpDates to say something nice about?
So off I go to the web site, UFO Updates, 100 latest messages, and my eyes scan down the list. You’ve got to be joking, right? I mean, I am stuck, totally stuck. Surely there has to be someone I can enthuse about.
I notice Nick Pope’s name. A Brit. I’m tempted to say “Another fucking Brit”. There’s a few on the List, scurrying around like rats with the plague, spreading pixie dust here and there. There’s the two Pelicanists plus attendant camp followers, “camp” being the word. Shough, who is Scottish and who has now become so boring as to potentially rival Frizz Chops. Miller - well OK’ish, Dickenson – a bit higglty pigglty, occasionalist David Haith, McGonagle, kerchung. Well, you can’t mention McGonagle without mentioning Pope, can you? McGonagle trails Pope round the List like a dog trailing a bitch on heat, his nose permanently stuck up Pope’s ass. So, Pope is a man under pressure. Why? McGonagle, Clark, Roberts, Anthony hate him. Do we care? Not really. Can we say anything nice about Pope? We’ll try.
Here goes. Nick Pope uses UFO UpDates to constantly remind us he is or was important by sending in posts that say, “I made this documentary in ……..” or “I will be appearing on this……………” or “When I was at the Sec Air 2 desk I…………..” and so fucking on and on.
Arthur.
Yes?
You were going to say something nice about Nick Pope, weren’t you?
I was.
Why haven’t you?
Because he’s an opportunist who rarely contributes, he just takes.
Is that what you think?
Yes.
Arthur.
Yes?
Would you like to revert back to type?
Yes.
This wasn’t very successful, was it?
No.
Why do you think that is?
Because the entire List are a bunch of wankers.
I see. OK, go and be nasty again.
-------------------------------------------------------
You should trust me. My instincts are pretty much always right. I have had occasion to make the odd marginally critical comment about Greg Boone and Kathy Kasten. He would fail a brain monitor test and she comes across like some demented harridan determined to punch above her weight which isn’t very significant in the first place.
Ufologically speaking, from an intellectual perspective they are ideally suited. Both talk sheer crap and have nothing to offer other than hysterical amusement and entertainment for the rest of us.
And so it comes to pass.
This from Thursday, in response to the Neurologically Challenged One’s previous effort along the lines of “Gee Wizz, let’s do the show right here”.
From: Kathy Kasten <catraja@msn.com>
To: ufoupdates@virtuallystrange.net
Date: Thu, 02 Nov 2006 17:32:02 +0000Subject:
Re: Ufology Mentalities
>From: Greg Boone <Evolbaby@aol.com
>To: ufoupdates@virtuallystrange.net
>Date: Wed, 1 Nov 2006 09:16:47 EST
>Subject: Ufology Mentalities
>We've all got our gripes and pet peeves when it comes to the types of
>mentalities that arise from ufological research.
>Some of these mindsets come from the public, some from the press,
>scientists, military, and of course other ufologists.
>The ones that set my teeth on edge are:
Thank gawd, there is another sane thinker out there. I thought I was all alone in the Universe.
KK
You are Kathy, you are. Thank gawd there aren’t any more like you.
But see, they’ve found each other. Do you detect a swoon on the part of Ms. Kasten towards Brain Dead? “Why Greg, you are so clever. You’re so knowledgeable, so worldly. Teach me Greg, Teach me. Greggie, how do I undo this bottle of peroxide Greggie? Oh, you’re so strong too”.
Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalph
Well, I had to. Sick stick Biddy please, sick stick; Now what the fuck is that? Oh gee, I have got problems. And this bit is so elasticky, so stretchy. Twaaaaaaaaang. I’m not sure that should be in there.
Never mind.
I predict phone fucking to follow soon and an engagement to be announced by Christmas. You mark my words.
-----------------------------------------
Alas and alack, Alfred is brown nosing too.
http://www.virtuallystrange.net/ufo/updates/2006/nov/m05-001.shtml
This time I might use a bucket as doing it on the floor is so messy.
I feel it in my fingers
I feel it in my toes
I’ve dropped a load of vomit
And now I need a blow.
Alfred are you busy?
Are you free to go?
Cos if you’re doing nothing
I think I’ll have that blow.
posted by Arthur @ 12:47 PM
6 Comments:
At 1:39 PM,
Alfred Lehmberg said…
Hey... no apologies. Wendy Connors is a genuine article, makes one hell of a contribution in the substantive sense, and indeed has a small teak and rosewood fetish in my personal ufological pantheon.
Don't get too worked up about it. Hell, I was even beginning to wonder if _you_ couldn't have a place in there, eh? You know, like a lump of pig metal holding the door? A place of honor, still. It's a pantheon after all, remember.
Though, I wouldn't count on a song...
As to the blow? Well, that looks remotely similar to a penis, only smaller, don't you think? Like a hot-dog thrown down a hallway, or a worm crawling into a train tunnel. Really, you shouldn't even have brought it up. You couldn't gag a gnat, I suspect.
Praise Wendy full of grace... amen.
alienview@roadrunner.com
> www.AlienView.net
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At 11:44 PM,
Anonymous said…
gitty gitty gitty gitty popin
gitty gitty gitty gitty popin
gitty gitty gitty gitty popin
bend me ovah cuz u be wantin to taste my film
gitty gitty gitty gitty popin. . .
At 4:29 AM,
Anonymous said…
Blessed are they who cannot resist the urge to log onto updates. Blessed are they indeed who're drawn by some deeply implanted need, to go to that place where the ufological gobshite collective dwell and twitter, strut or otherwise perform their bizarre rituals of self promotion and thereafter bask in the sunlight of their own enlightenment and wisdom.
Of course...you could avoid the update site if it REALLY bothered you all so much...but face it my children...how would you then function without such a heady fix, without feeling the rush of the collective's ponderings flowing through your viens?
How could you in fact FUNCTION without such a regular injection....my god, how could anyone seriously contemplate such a bizarre, twisted notion as DON'T FUCKING LOG ON IF OT BOTHERS YOU SO MUCH!
Sheeesh, indeed.
At 2:13 AM,
Anonymous said…
"Alas and alack, Alfred is brown nosing too.
http://www.virtuallystrange.net/ufo/updates/2006/nov/m05-001.shtml
This time I might use a bucket as doing it on the floor is so messy."
____________________________
That was embarrassing just reading Lehmberg and then watching his creations he linked to. I see that Lehmberg has lots of these video songs. To the right of "Wendy's Song" is a picture or photo that looks like shaved scrotum, which he titled "Hyperspace".
Whoever is responsible for him should bus the poor guy out to a special needs workshop during the day. He has way too much time on his hands.
At 3:00 AM,
Arthur said…
Special needs for Alfie it is then. But he is so needy, isn't he. Don't intefere with other patients, sorry, residents on the bus Alf. I know basket weaving is so corny these days, so passee, but prrrrrrraps his energies could be directed towards something more constructive. Like........bugger that for a minute. I've just realized; if you abridge Lehmy's first name to Alf and repeat it in pairs....Alf Alf, Alf Alf, etc and while doing that you hold your arms away from you at full length and clap your hands simultaneously, you are doing a very good impression of a seal. Alf, Alf. Alf Alf. Yee haw.
At 8:38 PM,
Anonymous said…
Wasn't Wendy Conners the UFO Updater who's homophobic rant was inadvertantly published on the list? About a year ago or so, I think.
Conners rant really was some hateful, neurotic shit. Makes this blog feel like a NewAged love and light seminar.
Surprised sensitive Alfred would even make a song for her, much less worship her in his pantheon of gods 'n' goddesses. Poor Alfred.
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